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Wednesday, April 08, 2009

"Shoreview, Shove It" Update

A postcard from the City of Shoreview removes all doubt about its intentions to take over your life: contrary to previously issued information, you are first assigned an appointment time for representatives of SL-serco (does anyone else think serpent when they hear that name?) to invade your home and do their snooping, and you must OPT OUT of that appointment time after having scheduled another. The onus is on you.

Well, that makes it easy. Citizens of Shoreview, you have lives. Fail to be home at the appointed time, and do not obediently call or log in to schedule another. That postcard got lost. You never saw it. Your kids get the mail and thought it was recycling material (proof of your eco-righteousness, right?). The postman has a secret vendetta against government waste. A capitalist anti-environmental group probably stole it from the postal distribution center. It blew away, and you dutifully chased it, but the wind wouldn't let it go. Your child got sick and you had to take them to Urgent Care, unexpectedly, and you're so sorry ... couldn't you reschedule? ... oh, sorry, completely booked until 2011. Your spouse wrote an important phone number on it and took it to work, whence it was never seen again. The postcard looked like it was from the IRS, and you have IRS-phobia, so you had your therapist burn it. ...

Tell them whatever you want, and the more it sounds, when translated, like "Shoreview, Shove It," the better.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought I was all alone in feeling unbelievable outrage when Shoreview sent the first postcard about the meters--where we were "required" to submit to a search of our homes. Evidently constitutional rights don't exist in Shoreview any more. But I think we are going to have to band together and become a force to be reckoned with, or I see this current Shoreview government as not stopping until they have taken over everything about life--since we should feel privileged to live in their city.Anyone interested in doing more than just talking anonymously on the internet--actually getting together and talking and strategizing in person? If so, email me and I will serve as a point person.
cmj685(at)comcast.net

5/24/2009 8:07 PM  

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